Miss Havisham’s April Appointments

Oh hi, April! Ever striving to approach the majesty of Martha Stewart herself, I humbly submit my own schedule for your eagle eyes. Here are the LA events I will be attending in the next few weeks. Maybe I’ll see you there, dearies. No foolin’.

Friday, April 1

April Fool’s Day! Avoid the internet, it is full of lies today. Fish don’t typically wear hats, for example.

Friday, April 1

The Great Horror Movie Night: Watch Stanley Kubrick’s masterpiece, The Shining, under the stars in the Griffith Park old zoo. Bring your blankets, bring your snacks, bring a flashlight. We’ll all be there, will you?

Friday, April 1

First Fridays at the Natural History Museum? Movies and science? Yes.

Give me any excuse to spend time there, I will take it.

Friday, April 1

Don’t miss this book signing and a chance to meet the author of Deceptive Desserts: A Girls Guide to Baking Bad, Christine McConnell, at Barnes and Noble at The Grove.

I love her instagram. I love her vision. Apparently she is baking cookies for the event.

Saturday, April 2

Missed her at The Grove? You get another chance. You can drive on down to Riverside and meet Christine McConnell and buy her book, Deceptive Desserts: A Girls Guide to Baking Bad.

Saturday, April 2-3

Theodore Payne’s annual native garden tour.

This is a fantastic event. Tour gardens all over LA and see how drought tolerant, native gardens can rival even the most manicured lawns. I’ve gone every year since I moved to LA. One day showcases the coastal and mid-city gardens and the other day showcases the inland and valley gardens so whatever your micro climate, you’re set.

Saturday, April 2

Yet another great event by Atlas Obscura. Take a tour of a miniature and prop shop.

“LA-based artist Calder Greenwood is a prop-maker, set builder, model maker, director, writer, and production designer who creates larger than life installations and truly magical spaces, all from a single material—cardboard.”  Tour his studio in downtown LA.

Saturday, April 2-April 3

A Current Affair Vintage Pop Up.

This beckons to me and will surely do damage to my bank account.

“A Current Affair is a major source of inspiration for designers with teams from Opening Ceremony, Saint Laurent, Giorgio Armani, Band of Outsiders, Trina Turk, Ralph Lauren, Free People, and Mara Hoffman all regularly shopping the event. Prices range from $30-$3000, reflecting the vast array of goods on display- from heritage denim to estate jewelry.”

All the gowns and glitter you need from times gone by. However will I show restraint?

Friday, April 1-April 3

For those of you who want to dance dance dance, check out The Roaring Twenties Street Jam.

Dance classes and events all over the city all weekend ranging from speakeasies to carousal rides with music accompaniment.  I’m going to try to squeeze in an event.

Thursday, April 7th

Pop-Up Magazine on tour.

“Pop–Up Magazine returns to The Theatre for an evening of storytelling, documentary film, radio, photography and performance. Some of our favorite writers and storytellers will perform never-before-seen work on stage, accompanied by visuals, recorded audio and live music. Nothing filmed, nothing recorded.”

Saturday, April 9-10

Wanna relive your troubled teens? Like to cry? Then head to this.

Sunday, April 10

The one, the only…Rose Bowl Flea.

Tuesday, April 12-14

Dita Von Teese Burlesque: Strip, Strip, Hooray! Variety Show.

Fashion and burlesque icon and poster girl for an alabaster complexion, Dita Von Teese performs.

Friday, April 15th

Odd Nights at the Autry.

Flea markets abound! Crafts, food vendors, live music. And who doesn’t love a cowboy museum? Select galleries will be open as well.

Saturday, April 16th

Obscura Day.

If you do one thing this month, make it an event through Atlas Obscura. Atlas Obscura hosts events across the globe today.

More than 150 events in 35 states and 25 countries. All in one day. 

There’s something for everyone. I’m really looking forward to a visit to LA’s ethical taxidermist Allis Markham of Prey Taxidermy.

I’m also going to the LA closing party and so should you. Check it out here. It’s taking place at Valley Relics.

Sunday, April 17

Long Beach Antique Market.

By now you all know this is my favorite flea in the city. You can read about some of my favorite finds here. I actually just bought a sun hat and a collapsible wagon. It’s on.

Thursday, April 21

25 to 5’s Anniversary Party

“A sophisticated cocktail lounge with a Mediterranean-style menu that caters to L.A.’s most discerning clientele, Riviera 31’s stunning and thought-provoking decor takes visitors on a visual journey through the evocative history of the French Riviera with photography by the legendary Edward Quinn. A unique mixology program includes masterfully crafted cocktails prepared table-side and the menu takes visitors on an epicurean journey through French coastal cuisine.”

All benefits are a donation to City of Hope.

 

Friday, April 29-30

Bob’s Burgers Live. I’m going to let that just sit there for a minute.

I love this show so yes, I want to see what the hell a live version of it is.

Pretty much anything Loren Bouchard creates is pure gold so sign me up.

Saturday, April 30th-May 1

Tired of flea markets yet? Me either. Head up to Paso Robles for the Three Speckled Hens Antique fair. Tickets are on sale now. Make a weekend of it.

Have a lovely April and remember, make time for a calming cup of tea. xoxo

 

Golden Boys and Silver Spoons: Flea Finds

Sunday was the ideal cool and overcast day for a pale girl to do the rounds at the Long Beach Antique Market. I wasn’t the only lady who thought so, the lovely Dita Von Teese was also in attendance looking stylish in a black circle skirt, pointed flats, and tiny vintage sunglasses. Hey girl, I love your style. Now please, Dita, tell me the brand of your sunblock, girlfriend to girlfriend.

I actually prefer the Long Beach Antique Market to the Rose Bowl because Long Beach is all antiques, it’s smaller, and often the weather is just as it was on Sunday, perfect. I usually end up finding something that makes me smile. This weekend I got a little more than I bargained for, quite literally.

The day started off innocently enough with this vintage stove fella from Antique Stove Style. He’s at Long Beach pretty much every month and restores these beauties himself. One day, yes one fine day I’m going to get one.

I just found this pink one on his facebook page. I’m in love.

The fun continued with minikins because maybe you are in need of some undies from the 1950’s? Gently worn…and why is there a marionette on the box? I like her style too.

Love gumballs? Love strippers? I have just the thing for you. A vintage gumball dispenser with a special surprise. A girl’s gotta work. The glass was a little steamy…

Next, I went a little silver teaspoon crazy. The details, the patina, the price…I had to have them all. I have no regrets because if you do stumble upon antique silver, even piecemeal like these, you must grab it up. They just don’t make patterns like these anymore and they’re easy to clean up if you really insist on removing the glorious tarnish.

Then I found this temple necklace at a booth with Thai imported antiques. I’m not sure of its age but it’s quite heavy. Thailand holds a special place in my heart because we spent our honeymoon there, so I bought it. No regrets there either.

Just as we were leaving the Thai booth, my eye caught a glimpse of a small object that looked a lot like a tiny baby skeleton. “For good luck,” the guy at the booth told me. It appeared to be made of clay. I bought it and took it home. Little did I know what I had bought and the responsibility I’d just assumed.

It seems I have purchased a Kumon Thong or a “Golden Boy” which is a little more complicated than being just “for good luck.” In all fairness the guy at the booth did hand me a printout from Wikipedia but it certainly wasn’t the whole story. A little digging on the internet turned up a very gruesome tale. Apparently what I have is a talisman made from the dirt of seven cemeteries. The talisman is said to have the trapped spirit of a dead boy inside it. When you take the Kumon Thong home with you, you are essentially adopting this child, a ghost child, and if you treat your ghost baby well he will grant you very good things.

Atlas Obscura has a great article on the tradition, “Caring for these statues has its own set of guidelines, requiring the owner to place it on a shelf and to offer it cups of milk and sweet drinks. Kuman thong are allegedly able to see and hear for a distance of 20,000 kilometers, giving ample protection to any household. Occasionally, however, the kuman thong are believed to be tricksters, with a particular fondness for teasing small children. When this happens, the owner is supposed to chastise the spirit by striking it lightly with a wooden rod while speaking to it in a stern tone. When someone is no longer able to care for a kuman thong in the proper fashion, he or she can dispose of it at a temple.” There, the monks must perform a series of rites to release the spirit from the talisman otherwise he stays with you and from the accounts I’ve read on the internet, you don’t want him to be angry.

The legend of the original Kumon Thong is gory and the occult practice of creating and worshipping them just as gory. It’s black magic. It has its roots in murder, revenge and necromancy. It wasn’t that long ago that Kumon Thong were made from actual stillborn babies. If you’d like to read the full (and I must warn, very disturbing) history of the Kumon Thong, click here.

So yeah, that’s in my house now, guys. So far I’ve followed the rules except for the first two days when he was still in the box and I didn’t know what he actually was (sorry, little buddy). He will supposedly visit us in our dreams and tell us if he’s happy or not. We’ll see what happens. There is a Thai temple near my house though…you know…just in case. Stay tuned.